Reverend Thomas R Martin

The Reverend Thomas R. Martin passed away on May 18, 2022, after a brief hospitalization in Tacoma WA. He is survived by his beloved, Steven Lynd, as well as daughters Julia Martin (Tracy Dillon) of Tacoma and Elin Martin, Elin’s child Eliza Morris, and Eliza’s father Mike Morris, all of Seattle WA. His best friend and wife, Patricia (Flower), predeceased him in 2003.

Known variously as Tom, Tommy, Pastor Tom, to the local gay community as Father Tom, and to one 4-year-old congregant long ago as “Mr. God”, he was known to all as a man committed to a life of compassion and social justice. He was born to the Rev. William M. Martin and Eleanor (West) Martin (who would later become ordained herself) in Yakima WA, as the youngest of their 5 children and Will’s 7 total children, spoiled by all but especially by his closest sisters Pat (Stockman) and Betty (Davis). His parents were role models of compassion in action. While posted to the Kamiah-Orofino circuit in 1922-23, his father refused the persistent efforts of the KKK to make him organize for them in Idaho, to which the KKK responded with a cross-burning that started a forest fire. Fined by the state forest service for starting the fire, Klan activity in the region came to an end. Tom took his parents’ example to heart, understanding that living one’s faith required hard work and courageous integrity.

Tom met his best friend and future wife, Pat, in middle school band class in Sunnyside WA. In school as throughout life, from Sunnyside High School to the College of Puget Sound (CPS, alma mater of his mother and Uncle Ray Martin, and subsequently daughter Julia) in Tacoma, and on, Tom was often the charismatic lead in school plays and friend-group hi-jinks, including christening the new swimming pool at CPS by skinny-dipping with friends before the new pool had officially opened (captured for posterity on film!) and initiating much laughter during CPS Adelphian Concert Choir tours. Upon marrying shortly after graduation from CPS in 1957 with the promise that he would never expect Pat to be a “typical minister’s wife”, Tom and Pat moved to Denver where he attended the Iliff School of Theology (’61) on the path to what would become a 39 year career with the United Methodist Church’s Pacific Northwest Annual Conference, with posts in Garfield, Finley, Kennewick, Lewiston (ID), Prosser, Calne Wilts (UK, through a pastoral exchange), Pullman, Everett, Eastern WA University (campus pastor), and Vashon Island, before returning to Tacoma for his retirement years – blocks from what is now the University of Puget Sound (UPS) – and a final post-retirement ministry in Central Park (near Aberdeen).

Tom was recently honored posthumously as a “trailblazer” for his service to and advocacy on behalf of the LGBTQI community by the 2022 Tacoma Pride Awards Committee. From the beginning he had put his charm, determination, belief in servant leadership, and one-time architectural aspirations to good use, helming restoration and building projects in many of his churches, and inspiring Methodist Youth Fellowship groups to fundraise and volunteer for building projects from Detroit in the ‘60s and England in the ‘70s (where he created lifelong family friendships) to Cuernavaca Mexico in the ‘80s, as well as restoring youth camps in the Northwest (Twinlow, Hidden Valley/Wooten, Mountain Air) that his father had helped found and build. As his ministry matured he poured himself into more personal projects, starting his 34 years of advocacy for the Reconciling Ministries of the United Methodist Church (https://rmnetwork.org/our-mission/), seeking justice for people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. He campaigned in 11 of 13 international General Conferences for full inclusion of gay, lesbian and transgender peoples, and led annual Strength for the Journey retreats (United Methodist retreats for persons living with HIV/AIDS, founded in 1988). He also performed numerous same-sex weddings throughout Washington when it was contrary to Methodist Church law and not yet permitted by US law. 

After his retirement in 1999 and Pat’s death in 2003, Tom finally felt the freedom to express himself more openly and come out publicly as a gay man. His beloved, Steve, was with Tom for nearly 2 decades and is “Grandpa Steve” to Tom & Steve’s sole grandchild Eliza.

A memorial service will be held at Mason United Methodist Church (2710 N Madison St, Tacoma WA) at 2pm on Friday, August 19, 2022. All in-person attendees are requested to wear face masks due to medically vulnerable family members. The service will be livestreamed from the Mason Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/masonchurchtacoma) for those who are unable to attend in person.

In 2016 Tom was a signatory to https://www.umqcc.org/a-love-letter-to-our-church-from-your-lgbtqi-religious-leaders. Please read it and see the Reconciling Ministries link above for insight into Tom’s faith and loving ministry. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that you consider a donation in Tom’s memory to Tacoma’s Rainbow Center https://www.rainbowcntr.org/, Reconciling Ministries https://rmnetwork.org/donate/, or the Washington State chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association https://www.alz.org/alzwa.

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